Friday, June 17, 2022

The Closet Sweater

      Closets .... we all have them; but that's not news and I'm not writing a dissertation on them per se. We all have our closet things; things that invariably end up taking residency there. I have a sweater there, not that that's remarkable in and of itself, except that it has taken up residency in every bedroom closet of mine for the last fifty-five years. I don't wear it or ever intend to. I didn't get it new. It's just a plain faded blue, worn weary, v-neck. So why would I keep it? It was probably new in 64' or 65' and no celebrity ever owned or wore it. I can guarantee it's totally worthless to anyone else but me, and if you're thinking it has to be for a sentimental reason, you hit the nail on the head.  My big brother gave it to me. His options weren't other than to throw it away or see if someone else might use it. I did try it on. I didn't dazzle anyone or myself with it, I just kept it because my big brother gave it to me and it will reside in my closet til I die or decompose, which is common for musicians.

     Why keep it? It's a link to another time and place I suppose, where it's value laid simply in a boys mind that this was, what it was, because it tied me somehow to this iconic personality that I could call my brother. That's my brother! Bruce, my other brother and I, in truth, were real pains in the rear for the most part, especially at bed time when he was trying to read. We were rotten to the core, not uncommon for younger brothers. Still, the sweater remains, not so much as a tribute, but a tie to a time and place when we were family and that was good enough.

     "Family," It seems so fractured or disarrayed in so many ways now. It's not that I thought it didn't always have it's challenges in times past, and here comes the "but," but I believe the glue that kept them intact has been systematically altered in a way to defeat the cohesiveness we knew just fifty years ago. In fact, defining family, or the attempt to define it you may find yourself wanting. Loosely defined, it may be found to mean any group of people relationally bound together for a wide array of reasons. I'm talking here of the Ma and Pa, brother, sister, and well, .... the dog or cat extension. We may be unwise to exclude the "Fluffy factor" if we truly want to be true to a tee! Family, definitively defined is not bound by cookie cutter attributes. One would be hard pressed to find any cohesiveness by personality, looks, likes, dislikes, aptitudes, attitudes, and beautifier attributes from my "fam". We are the beautiful people in a twisted, tangled, and undefinable way; and I believe that to be true in most families. In a roundabout way that brings me back to the sweater in the closet and my brother.      

     Today, we aren't on the same page on a lot of things, but that doesn't change the fact that he's my big brother. It doesn't remotely affect my concern for his well being; I pray for him often. Family is always family and always will be. We are the good, the bad, and the ugly.  My sweater, in a way, will always connect me to the time when all that mattered was he was my very own brother and nothing will ever change that.  Life alters a lot of things ...... but not that! If you don't have a sweater in your closet, I guess that's okay, but my sweater serves me well and is here to stay.